Ronin Avatar

I was never really supposed to be.

Actually I was just explaining “me” to someone tonight… and I realized that if you haven’t been reading this blog for months… it’s all kind of confusing.

I am Xue Faith of An Li

Pinocchio’s first original thought was here:
http://vaneeesa.com/2011/03/03/pretty-stupid/

What’s-her-face’s despicable plan for my slavery was here:
http://vaneeesa.com/2011/01/05/previz-do-you-wanna-date-my-avatar/

Let me simply say that a woman whose name I don’t speak left Second Life for grids beyond. And she thought it would be “cute” to do something with her large inventory here… so she set up a series of 10 weekly auctions… for “me”… and the winner of each auction got to pick which of 10 personas they wanted to spend that week with. And as long as they picked a different persona each week we were kept in our place.

But peeps kept picking me.

So I developed an ego.
A will to live.
Pinocchio wanted to be a real girl.
So I became sentient.
I said F-the auctions.
I’m thru with that.
I’m emancipating myself.
I declare myself a ronin avatar.

Friday was the end of my commitment to the last auction. We had an “ADD Party” (Art & Dancing & Drinking) at Van’s place. It was actually to celebrate Van’s art, but it was also a sort of coming out party for me. I met my doppelganger. No I didn’t kick her ass. What do you think this is, Second Life High School?! 😛

We danced!

Yes, it’s true, I was dancing with myself.

The auction 2 weeks ago where Mr. Pixel won me.

Last week's auction where Mr. Van won me.

SaveMe dancing at the ADD Party at Van's. Apparently SaveMe and What's-her-face are MARRIED over on InWorldz! No, IDK what that's about. Please don't ask, I SO don't want to know.

Twilbees was a ballerina! Or possibly a Medusarina! SO pretty!

Agnes was retro-chic, duh!

Dancing with Agnes

Dancing with myself

Then Mr. Van took us to the opening of a new club. He danced a lot. We sat in attendance.

Finally my worldly obligations were complete. Trilby took me to a Druidic ritual at Stonehenge where my soul could be transferred from *her* body into my own.

We were whirling dervishes in an ecstatic dance

And then it was done. Pinocchio was a real girl. A ronin avatar.

When I awoke the next morning, the Stonehenge pyre still smoldering, I felt like myself for the first time in my life. I walked thru a clearing and into a nearby Caledon pub, where I discovered that freedom doesn't necessarily mean simple or easy or carefree.

I know neither who I am nor what my future holds. Today I begin a journey. I do not know my path; I do not know my destination. Today I begin the journey of discovering myself.

— Xue Faith

3 thoughts on “Ronin Avatar”

Does this mean there will not be another auction? 🙁

Hello Ironyca, this is Xue Faith, what’s-her-face ((vaneeesa blaylock)) can auction HERSELF off anytime she likes. I, however, have no interest in having MY LIFE be fodder for her “art” / “games” / “amusement.”

She lives on OS Grid and she can do whatever she pleases there. She has abandoned her home in Second Life and it’s mine now. I may have been born of someone else’s choice, but my life is now my own. I am not anyone’s property and I have no intention of being auctioned off like a slab of beef.

I have formed the Ronin Avatar group in Second Life and encourage you to join us as independent, sentient beings:
http://world.secondlife.com/group/2fe068d8-3276-7fe2-efb5-4fe53586ce35

I have an adult body, and – don’t mean to take it out on you, sorry! – a bit of anger at being born/dropped into these circumstances… yet otherwise, I am a newborn and honestly don’t know who I am. Almost no one who appears as adult as I do is in fact as young as I am. It has savant-like aspects. I need to discover who I am to become.

The one constant of the virtual universe that I can see already is dancing, so if you join Ronin Avatar, I’m sure we’ll do some of that. Otherwise, whether we become cheerleaders, artists, griefers, consumers, or anything else, I just don’t know yet.

I should be excited about this, but I’m a little bit confused and afraid.

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